Out of Whack

Many many years ago, I started seeing a new therapist. I had two children under 3 and a part-time job. My husband worked during the day as well as three nights a week and we lived in a large house that always needed cleaning. One of the first things I remember that therapist saying to me was

“You’re in crisis.”

I didn’t know it. I wouldn’t have said it. But I was. And I am ever grateful to him for noticing and helping me out of it.

I might be wrong, but I’m getting the impression that there are a lot of teachers right now who are in a version of crisis. They might be in full-fledged falling-apart COVID crisis. Or they might just feel off-kilter, out of whack, unable to establish and maintain balance in their lives.

If you are one of these teachers or if you know one (or more) of these teachers, hear me: You and they deserve to get

back in whack.

You deserve to retreat to your garden.

You deserve to be “selfish.”

You deserve to just sit with it.

You deserve to focus on relationships with your students rather than on panic about learning loss.

You deserve to design instruction that is playful and fun for you (at the very least).

You deserve to strip your teaching down to the bare bones.

You deserve to teach “critical feeling.”

You deserve to say, “I won’t.”

You deserve to leave those voids alone.

You deserve to strengthen your boundaries around your empathy.

You deserve to avoid secondary traumatization.

You deserve to be good-enough, not perfect.

You deserve to be cared for, to get support.

I am sorry about the messes COVID has made. I am so sorry about all the suffering people are feeling. I implore teachers to figure out how to — where to — pull back to, how to pare down your responsibilities and your worries so they don’t take up all the space in your lives. Unfortunately, no one will do it for you. Only you can do it.

But maybe you’re just fine! (Which would be great.)

Either way, here’s a possible mantra: Where’s the gold nugget of my life today? Let everything else fall away.